It's like Christmas

I've barely been able to sleep.

It's dawn now in Kanchanaburi, the morning of the big adventure race. I'm staying in a hut on the River Kwai and all night images have been turning over in my mind of scaling rock faces, downhill mountain biking and jungle running.

2hrs until start time...off to get up, shower and drink some more water...

I live in a fashion hub (3)

Classic Thailand hair-do.

Beached as, bru

Happy birthday Clare!

We're currently having dinner at the Shangri La on the banks of the Chao Praya river celebrating Clare's 26th birthday!

This is a picture of Clare with one of the many delicious attractions - three skewered Chiang Mai strawberries draped in liquid chocolate from the restaurant's resident chocolate fountain!

I live in a fashion hub (2)

I am so connected right now.

This is my first ever mobile phone post, so I thought I would mark it with some high fashion I was able to capture in the city.

It seems 2009 is all about the spandex space dancer look...

In training

I’m currently in training for a 5-6 hour adventure triathlon, just 2.5 weeks away from its painful reality.

The adventure race is happening on the 28th of February in the hills of Kanchanaburi Province about 2.5hrs NW of Bangkok and 1hr east of the Burmese border. I’ve visited the place a few times before – twice to commemorate the Aussie soldiers who worked there as POWs under the Japanese during WW2, and the other time to have a bit more of a look around at the national parks and nightlife with a mate from footy.

The race is basically a two-person team adventure with jungle running, cross-country cycling, kayaking, swimming events, as well as perhaps the odd muscle cramp.

My mate Brian and I are forming what could quite possibly be the slowest team on the circuit, and will race alongside a few other mates from my rugby club.

I can’t wait to get amongst it – see the website for it all here.

Cultural sensitivities (2)

A conversation with one of my heavily accented Thai colleagues as we walked back from lunch today:

Me: *Pointing to a street-side stall holder* "Wow...is that guy selling ice cream already? It's not even that hot yet."
Thai colleague (TC): "No, he is selling a type of Thai drink."
Me: Oh, right, what kind of drink?
TC: "Iced brain drinks"
Me: "Sorry??"
TC: "Iced brain drinks, like in plastic bags with straws"
Me: "Oh, right"

It wasn’t until I got back in the office that I realized she meant ‘Iced blend drinks’.

God bress Thai accents.

Giving 110%...

A funny little opinion piece from this morning's SMH Online about language and sport.

Click here.

Ever wondered how old you are?

Try this link:

http://www.timeanddate.com/date/duration.html

It basically work out how long it has been between two dates. I'm 9,219 days old and have been going out with Clare for a blissful 169,171,200 seconds.

Nerdy, yes. But brilliant if you're trying to work out how many days/minutes it’s been since you were married, been travelling, or your last alcoholic drink…

The José way

One benefit of living over here is that when ‘western’ style events happen, it’s not too hard to get involved.

East Timor’s President José Ramos-Horta recently visited Bangkok as part of the International Peace Foundation’s ‘Bridges’ speaker program. The program is bringing some of the world’s most acute minds across the Asia-Pacific region to talk about world affairs under the umbrella of peace.

For twelve bucks I was able to roll out of bed on a Sunday morning, wipe the sleep from my eyes, and listen to Professor Ramos-Horta, the 1996 Nobel Peace Prize Laureate, speak at the Foreign Correspondent’s Club about all things peace and foreign affairs. Cool.

Professor Ramos-Horta is one incredibly intelligent bloke. He chatted off the cuff for a couple of hours on everything from microcredit schemes, what the Middle East needs to do to solve its troubles long-term, Iraq, Cuba & the US, Australia’s refugee policy, East Timorese civic and national development, maritime protection and border security in the Timor Sea.

What I found most interesting, alongside themes in my current reading of Bill Clinton’s ‘Presidential Years’, was what life was like as a national leader dealing daily with diplomacy at home and abroad. Admittedly, East Timor is miniscule when it comes to world super-powers, but its recent independence and proximity to the Muslim world has cast Ramos-Horta into the international spotlight.

His opinions:

Myanmar and Cuba
The US and EU should review their policies to impose sanctions on Myanmar and Cuba, with a view to generating peace in the long term. Apparently he has stated his case at the UN quite fervently on this. I don’t know enough about the issue to agree or disagree, however I don’t know if a full removal would be the best course of action in the two countries at this time. Interestingly, he’s also apparently good pals with Fidel and Raul Castro, stopping in on them recently when he visited in Cuba.

East Timor
Apparently things are doing well there, however for the bloke in charge of a country to say otherwise would be irresponsible. Apparently last month, the United Nations Department of Peacekeeping Operations reportedly warned in a report that East Timor is at "risk of anarchy" if its economic problems are not addressed. East Timor is also among the world's poorest nations, with unemployment at about 50 percent.

Amanda Vanstone
When preparing for his first dealing with the then Federal Minister, he was apparently surprised when he had heard from other people in the diplomatic world that she could be likened to an ‘older version of Kylie Minogue’!!

East Timorese Labour
An interesting argument for East Timorese labour to be placed in the Australian countryside on seasonal visas, arguing that it would solve problems for both countries. Could it also be creating more problems for Australia though?

Iraq
He didn’t fully endorse the military actions in Iraq and Afghanistan, however he did state that the dissolution of Saddam’s regime is a good thing. The silence from many liberal journalists in the Club was almost deafening. An interesting view from an advocate for peace, however perhaps he playing into UN politics here…

Israel and Palestine
A juicy few tangents of discussion. On democracy in Palestine, he said it was good that it is alive in the country, however Hamas must rethink their strategy if they are to responsibly care for the long-term good of its people.

On Israel, Professor Ramos-Horta said the Israelis should be a little more balanced and humane in their response to attacks on their country.

Can the tensions be resolved at this stage? Probably not, unless someone similar to Mahatma Ghandi or Nelson Mandela can step up from the Palestinian side. "Stop fighting violence with violence and engage Mahatma Gandhi's civil disobedience-style. [Palestinians] can paralyse the entire economy of Israel, and even get sympathy among Israeli people and millions around the world."

Australia’s refugee policy
He is most definitely not a fan, however he isn’t exactly shouting from the rooftops as he knows how much support Australia has, and does give to his country.

I also got a feeling he’s aiming up to head up the UN in the next elections to happen in 2012. Watch this space!

Rev. Jesse Jackson is coming to town in mid-April, so I’ll be looking forward to hearing what he’s got to say.

Big hits

I love this YouTube clip...

I am a pig

At my last job working at a PR agency in Sydney, the 85% female workplace dominated conversation with topics ranging from the greatest ever Australian Idol moments, to some bloke called Max Factor and the benefits of fake tanning over sunbeds.

It’s a little different here in Bangers - my slightly more multicultural and sexually balanced workplace discusses issues spanning the best place to buy Asian jelly dessert portions, how to avoid the ghosts of the tsunami whilst on holiday and each person’s respective Chinese Zodiac animal, according to their birth year.

Apparently, I’m a pig. No doubt my sisters will have a field day with this.

"PIG: Pigs are tolerant and generous, virtuous and peaceful. They are well liked for their honesty and warm natures. They aim to find the best in people and allow others plenty of freedom of expression. They are often imbued with the energy of wealth and the support of others though they are not concerned with accumulating wealth. They can be content with modest means. They rarely criticise others and are not vengeful and thus have few enemies. The Pig accepts the existing richness of life and doesn't demand more. They enjoy simple and earthy pleasures. In relationships they give love and affection and trust that they will receive the same. They possess considerable determination and if they set their minds on something will pursue it and attain it. Good careers are in music, food, writing, social work, gardening and looking after others."

Years: 1923, 1935, 1947, 1959, 1971, 1983, 1995, 2007.

I do find it hard to believe all of my contemporaries from 1983 can be homogenously classed into the above category, however with the Chinese set to take over the world midway through my generation, it’s probably best not to complain.

What are you? See here.

Christmas 2008

Clare and I spent Christmas and Boxing Day with a couple of friends down south this year, my first away from home. We chose Khao Lak, a town on the Western (Andaman) coast of Thailand, roughly 90 minutes north of Phuket. Khao Lak was the area worst hit area in Thailand by the 2004 Boxing Day tsunami, with water reaching 4km inland, hundreds of people dead, and years of tourist development lost.

Previously famed for diving, at Christmas the area still had a distinct lack of tourists, except for a busload of Frenchies bunking down at a French-themed resort down the road. Many hotels are still slowly being developed, as tourist dollars drip back into the area.

Despite no one really being there, we still had a killer time. We stayed at a pimping resort with two swim-up bars (yes, Angus and Willis, TWO). Unfortunately there was no strict dresscode for 65-year old German female bathers, so Clare and I copped quite a saggy eyeful.

The resort had a whole heap of stuff for hire including a windsurfer (my first time, great fun), bikes, table tennis etc. It was a relaxing antidote to a very stressful last couple of months at work.

Right: Clare relaxes by the pool...

Left: Our friends Kate and Clint exhalt after remembering they were on holiday with Clare and I.

Below: Batman's longtail boat. Note the boat's bow.

Looking sharp

It's important to have pride in your appearance - to look sharp, if you will.

The lady who washes and irons our clothes evidently understands this importance and ensures that even my boardshorts are properly presented.

Razor-sharp creases down the middle of my boardshorts

@ Work

Back at work now – a picture of my surrounds.


Note my fish Nit Noi, who has been residing here whilst I was on holidays. We also keep the blinds closed because a lot of the Thai staff here dislike direct sunlight due to excessive sun-tanning (which is quietly considered too agrarian and lower-class). As you can see, I need all the sun I can get.

Also of note is my tie, a Bt 100 number from Silom Rd, which a mate of mine Dave also purchased when visiting recently, keeping the cross-continental Bangkok tie-wearing dream alive.

You may also notice a new book on my desk I’m about to start reading, ‘The Diplomatic Dog of Barbados’ by Winfred Peppindink, delightfully sent to me for Christmas by another mate of mine, and literary connoisseur, Willis. It’s a tale of a diplomat's dog who makes good in the tough tropical sands of the Caribbean.

Just FYI.

In 2008, I...

Went surfing at 6am on New Years Day at Manly Beach Sold my queen-sized bed for $2 on eBay Moved to Thailand Holidayed in six different countries: with Angus, Clare and new mates in Thailand, Clare in Malaysia, Clare in Singapore, Em in the UAE, Myself in Cambodia, and the O’Connors & Bells in Australia Went fishing with my old man and caught my first Bream in years Wrote 72 blog posts Caught 20-something flights Got my first grey hair Drove twice Scored two tries in rugby Broke four pairs of sunglasses Gave my old employer six weeks leaving notice to be a good bloke and got screwed for four Ate tarantula and flipped out Ate BBQ’d prawns on the beach and loved it Ate Som Tum (Spicy Thai green papaya salad) and hated it Ate Chili crab in Singapore with Clare and made a mess Was often addressed as “Herro, Massa’a” and heard “Skoomy sirrr, sexy DVD, ping-pong, you want??” at least 500 times Started playing rugby again, and went alright Started playing cricket again, and sucked! Started wakeboarding, and was ‘stoked’ Started drinking ice with my beer Played golf at some of Asia’s best courses Went surfing with Clare on an artificial wave, also being filmed live in Malaysian travel show Went caving in a Thai National Park Was admitted to hospital for a total of 2% of my 2008 Was unemployed for a total of 34% of the year Lost 10% of my body weight Rode a mountain bike 24km across the Northern Thai countryside in 43 degree heat and vomited four times Rode a scooter, an elephant, bamboo raft and a mechanical bull for the first time ever, but not at the same time Lived for more than a month in four different places

Stopped living in the Moodie Street ‘Dog House’ with one of my best mates Visited the middle east for the first time ever Grew a strong affinity for ‘rice with egg’ or Khao Kai Dow, as they say in the business Started using internet on my mobile Probably didn’t keep in contact with my family and friends enough Moved in with Clare Helped prepare my Mum’s rose garden Started paying for my laundry to be washed, dried, ironed and delivered, with the only drawback being that my boardshorts now have dweeby razor-sharp creases ironed down the middle Went to a Thai winery and got pissed Went snorkeling in the Gulf of Thailand Went wind-surfing in the Andaman Sea Went to Thailand’s highest temple and got blessed by a monk Only occasionally saw a sky full of stars Watched Kylie Minogue, live in concert Celebrated my first Christmas away from home Missed all of my family’s birthdays Bought new boots Bought a new mobile phone Bought a new laptop and got connected, baby Bought a new fish, ‘Nit Noi’ Found an amazing tailor Survived Bangkok protests, bombings, fires, an economic downturn and several drinking sessions with my rugby mates Sweated more than the previous five years combined Got pissed in three separate swim-up bars Learned to surf Learned Thai cooking techniques Learned Cambodian cooking techniques Learned a bit of Thai language Learned a bit more about myself Read 18 books Started reading The Economist and love it Supported the pirated DVD trade with the purchase of about 70 new DVDs Enjoyed my first ever ladyboy show (Painfully) enjoyed my first ever Thai massage Fell asleep before midnight again on New Years Eve

Workin hard for the money, honey

...sorry I've not posted much in a while.

Have had a fair bit happening at work with tainted milk crises, 2009 planning, launching mobile internet banking and website restructuring - all on top of the usual trials of negotiating my way through two different working cultures...Arab and Asian!!!

Have a bit of time off coming up over Christmas, so will post some stuff up soon. To keep you entertained in the meantime, here's something that Willis shared with me on facebook:



No one epitomises the Christmas spirit more than John Rambo.

Joke for Angus

Four fonts walk into a bar.


Barman: "Get out of here! This is no place for your type!"

Clare @ Kylie

I love this photo of Clare - I took it at the Kylie Minogue concert last Sunday night.

Note:

• The glowstick.
• The beer...we smashed a few that night.
• The knee-high strap-up boots, pink skinny jeans, black corset and pink flanney.
  

The concert wasn't too bad...the dancing was pretty cool and despite being a bit over the hill, Kylie looks like she's still got the ability to put on a decent show.

Most people fell into the following categories: Female pop fans, gay male pop fans, awkward boyfriends not sure why they're at a Kylie concert.

OH&S

This is a picture of a few blokes fixing a wind break on the 17th floor of a building being constructed near our apartment. Clearly not ones to worry about heights.

Unabashed grooming

Image is everything here in Bangkok. You see hundreds times each day people checking their reflection in mirrors, spoons, shop windows, computer screens - the works. Here's a video of a cabbie here in Bangkok who used his rear vision mirror to perform some extra special nasal grooming as we waited in traffic...

Thanks

...to all those who sent messages to Clare and I over the past week.

Thailand sucks right now

Usually when I tell people I live in Thailand, their eyes come alive with exotic mental images of saffron robes, beaches and bucket boozing. However, they often forget that there's at times an emotional tax in living overseas.

Yesterday morning, a dear friend of Clare and mine died suddenly in Australia.

Paul was a delightfully thoughtful husband and father, a godfather to Clare, close friend to the O'Connor family and no doubt many others.

Spending time with him was as crisp and refreshing as a morning springtime walk...he seemed to have that knack of energising you in a way that only a new morning could.

In our private discussions, Paul was an amazing source of confidence and quiet advice. Apart from being a first-class, fun bloke to hang out with, he was a wonderful support as I awkwardly shuffled my way into Thailand. We discussed everything from dealing with different cultures, family and relationships, work and improving my terrible golfing short game.

And this is exactly one of those times I wish he was around for.

So right now, we have mates and family in Australia who we can't look after, and an impending funeral which we can't attend.

Those that have lived overseas know what I'm talking about, some more so than others.

Thailand sucks right now.

Boeing boozing

I wrote this post while flying from Bangers to Dubai for quick business trip...I'm not really flying and blogging right now...


There's something quite enticing about a 3049 mile trip with free booze.

Not only am I excited about being on my first fully-paid overseas business trip, but also the fact that it's Friday night and I'm in the mood to have a couple to relax after a massive week at work.

Right now I'm flying over India, roughly about 500km east of Mumbai. I've so far tallied a jovial two beers, five wines, three X.O.s and two shots of port...oh, hang on...another X.O. has just arrived.

Right, back to it.

So anyway, I'm bloody excited.

The problem is, the bloke next to me is an Arab who, despite intermittently hocking up the most obscene wads of phlegm from his throat, doesn't look like he's keen for a drink.

Meaning - there's free booze and I don't have a drinking partner.

Which made me think - who would I most want to spend a few hours of stratospheric boozy bliss with?

Well, I reckon Barrack Obama would be a good start. Just picking his brains on his campaign strategy and the whether secret service agents actually have a sense of humour would be pretty sweet.

But then again, seeing as he's now just made President, he's probably not really one to risk a hangover, not to mention the fact his surrounding agents would be clicked off safety with all of our middle-eastern brothers sharing the flight.

So what about Germaine Greer?? Could be an interesting discussion. I think I'd start proceedings off with an ice-breaking joke: How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? None. Feminists can't change a thing.

Oh the hilarity! Her voracious and much more educated tongue may get a little too intense for me though...and I'm not sure what her aim is like with a wine glass...

Tom Jones? Dig it. But only if there's karaoke. I've always wanted to do a topless rendition of 'It's not unusual' with the big man.

A trio of my all-time favourite three ex-international rugby hookers, Phil Kearns (Australia), Keith Wood (Ireland) and Sean Fitzpatrick (New Zealand)? Loose. Talking rugby and getting on the cans for 7 hours with these blokes would make a bloody good trip. We could even pack down a few scrums with the Thai hosties.

Prince Harry? I'm not usually one for the British Royals, but I reckon this fanta-pant regal bad-boy might have a bit of bubble inside him...I could easily see us spraying beer about the cabin and partaking in the odd push-up comp.

The mind boggles, really...

Who would you like to spend a boozy flight with?

I live in a fashion hub

Paris...Milan...New York...Soi 12...

Yep, that's right, my street is right up there with the crossroads of world fashion - as evidenced by this guy from my building who I shared a lift with one day.

Note the matching blue leather slides and tweed pants.