Go go go! (Bag)
Be alert, but not alarmed people - some hot news in Sydney today.
Sydney's Lord Mayor, Clover Moore, has joined forces with the Federal Attorney-General's department to launch a new campaign creatively named, "Lets Get Ready Sydney".
As part of the plan, the campaign will today release 200,000 booklets which advise what to do in the event of a terrorist attack or natural disaster.
One of their suggestions is for people to prepare a 'Go-Bag'...essentially something you can grab on the run if you're confronted by a group of pissed off Decepticons or a five-story high carnivorous dinosaur.
What has Clover and her good mate Phil Ruddock suggested people pack?
But I think they may be forgetting a few items:
- Ipod - nothing can go wrong when you've got Jack Johnson ticking along
- A copy of Nostradmus' Les Propheties - a bit like a movie preview
- Lamb sandwich - you'll get hungry whilst running away from aforementioned carnivorous ancient reptile
- 100mL bottle of Ultra-sensitive Day Moisturising Lotion by Jurlique - even in a catastrophic, possibly life-ending event, it's essential you maintain a radiant complexion
- MacGyver - he can get you out of anything
- A few beers - to drink whilst MacGyver does his shit
- Some doritos - to eat whilst you're drinking the beers
- A spare pair of undies - just do it
What would you put in your 'Go-Bag'??
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9 comments:
Me Bell, i like your extra suggestions but what about antiseptic hand lotion (we dont' want to get sick on our run), a toothbrush and tooth paste (after eatign the lamb sambo we might not smell too hot, deodorant (same as before but after the run) and contraceptive devices (after all that beer and boredom... and we don't want to fill a country in turmoil from raptors with babies)
Hmmm...
I'd pack Sarah Aitken's Red Car.
It's fast, compact and has gotten me out of a few sticky situations in the past!
Library Lawn anyone?
Also - can I request that the beers you pack are Extra Dry's?
Becks
On the contrary, I suggest free love to all. I think we'll need to restock the country with a new generation of raptor-fighters.
Millgate
a) Define 'sticky'
b) They will be Carlton Draught longnecks, drunk from a paper bag. ;-)
a blackberry to blog about the experience
I'm still wondering what the adhesive tape is used for. Perhaps the silencing of dissidents?
I think I'd also place a bomb defusal kit in my Go bag (every good CT wannabe needs one), as well as a copy of the How to grab headlines and attempt to revive awareness on issues that have lost public interest: Without something blowing up or direct reference to War Edition pamphlet. I believe it's just a picture of Clover Moore's head.
... and just to continue my rant.. how about a gun and some mace?
I mean, what the hell am I going to do when the terrorists rock into town? Throw my coveted bogroll at them? Make a massive spitwad with my bottle of water and toilet paper to launch in their general direction? Threaten to put both ends of their tongue on my spare D-Cell batteries?
If the situation is so dire that I'm forced to living out of a backpack, surely it meets my looting threshold and ability to break in and spend the following weeks/months living in David Jones, eating out of the Food Hall and sleeping on the beds sprinkled throughout the store.
don't forget a camera! imagine the facebook profile shot you could get with 2 decepticons in the background!
Sar
You are the antithesis of social media!!!
Willis
I reckon we should also throw in a few flashbangs. And maybe an auto shotty.
Adrian
Now that would kick ass!
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