I wrote this post while flying from Bangers to Dubai for quick business trip...I'm not really flying and blogging right now...
There's something quite enticing about a 3049 mile trip with free booze.
Not only am I excited about being on my first fully-paid overseas business trip, but also the fact that it's Friday night and I'm in the mood to have a couple to relax after a massive week at work.
Right now I'm flying over India, roughly about 500km east of Mumbai. I've so far tallied a jovial two beers, five wines, three X.O.s and two shots of port...oh, hang on...another X.O. has just arrived.
Right, back to it.
So anyway, I'm bloody excited.
The problem is, the bloke next to me is an Arab who, despite intermittently hocking up the most obscene wads of phlegm from his throat, doesn't look like he's keen for a drink.
Meaning - there's free booze and I don't have a drinking partner.
Which made me think - who would I most want to spend a few hours of stratospheric boozy bliss with?
Well, I reckon Barrack Obama would be a good start. Just picking his brains on his campaign strategy and the whether secret service agents actually have a sense of humour would be pretty sweet.
But then again, seeing as he's now just made President, he's probably not really one to risk a hangover, not to mention the fact his surrounding agents would be clicked off safety with all of our middle-eastern brothers sharing the flight.
So what about Germaine Greer?? Could be an interesting discussion. I think I'd start proceedings off with an ice-breaking joke: How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? None. Feminists can't change a thing.
Oh the hilarity! Her voracious and much more educated tongue may get a little too intense for me though...and I'm not sure what her aim is like with a wine glass...
Tom Jones? Dig it. But only if there's karaoke. I've always wanted to do a topless rendition of 'It's not unusual' with the big man.
A trio of my all-time favourite three ex-international rugby hookers, Phil Kearns (Australia), Keith Wood (Ireland) and Sean Fitzpatrick (New Zealand)? Loose. Talking rugby and getting on the cans for 7 hours with these blokes would make a bloody good trip. We could even pack down a few scrums with the Thai hosties.
Prince Harry? I'm not usually one for the British Royals, but I reckon this fanta-pant regal bad-boy might have a bit of bubble inside him...I could easily see us spraying beer about the cabin and partaking in the odd push-up comp.
The mind boggles, really...
Who would you like to spend a boozy flight with?